In New England, the seasons of Summer and Fall have always been a popular time to celebrate the holy Sacrament of Matrimony.
Sacred Scripture begins with the creation and union of man and woman and culminates with “the wedding feast of the Lamb.” (Rev 19:7,9) Marriage reflects the spousal love Jesus has for the Church. One of the Nuptial Blessings in the Wedding Mass is, “Father, you have made the union of man and wife so holy a mystery that it symbolizes the marriage of Christ and his Church.”
Among the many benefits of the Sacrament is the infinite power of God’s grace, which helps couples keep their commitment and find happiness together. Social scientists find that couples who bring God’s presence in their relationship experience more satisfaction and are more likely to achieve lifelong marriage. All in all, couples who choose to bring their marriage into the Church receive many gifts: peace of heart, oneness with the Church, the fullness of Sacramental grace, and God’s special blessing upon their marriage.
The marriage covenant is far more than a contract; it is the union of persons capable of knowing and loving each other and God. The celebration of marriage is also a liturgical act, appropriately held in a public liturgy at church. Catholics are urged to celebrate their marriage within the Eucharistic Liturgy. Still, some couples, for various reasons, have chosen to be married outside of the Church, oftentimes by a Justice of the Peace.
Whatever the reason for that choice, and regardless of how long ago that may have occurred, couples are always invited to receive the grace of the Sacrament of Matrimony. This is accomplished through a process called “Convalidation.” This is sometimes referred to shorthand as “having one’s marriage blessed.”
Some couples seeking convalidation may be young and were civilly married only a few years ago. Some couples may have been civilly married more than forty years ago and are grandparents and even great-grandparents.
The seeking of convalidation has also paved a happy path for those who have not yet received the Sacrament of Confirmation to do so as a prerequisite to be married in the Church. Ultimately, what brings them all to the altar, regardless of their ages, is the desire for God’s grace and blessings.
The preparation process for convalidation is the same as a newly engaged couple approaching the Church. The same instruction and gathering of certificates and records are required. As with every couple, this preparation process determines if the couple is “free to marry” according to the Church’s prescriptions.
Liturgically, the convalidation liturgy may be quite simple. Minimally, the presence of the couple, a priest or deacon, two witnesses (the equivalent of a best man and maid of honor), a declaration of consent, and the exchange of vows is required. However, additional family and friends of course can be invited. The liturgy of the Word, the liturgy of the Eucharist, and sacred music may be added as well. The priest or deacon overseeing the preparation for convalidation is pleased to oversee the planning of this liturgy. To be sure, this is a happy and blessed day for both the couple and the Church.
Dear friends, if you were or someone you know was married outside the Church, please speak with us to discuss convalidation. I pray that every couple receives the grace of the Sacrament and experiences the depth of God’s love for them.